Tis the season

The holidays are approaching. I've noticed that most people around this time, focus on what they "want" opposed to what they "have". I am one of those people. My family has been torn apart.. exactly why, hasn't been discovered. My Grandfather passed away in 1999 and my Grandmother in 2004. Since then my family hasn't been much of a family. The holidays come and my Mother and I are excluded from the festivities. So now it seems my only family includes my Mother, her best friend and her associates.
I am in a relationship at the present time, which has been great. However, it also has been trying. It seems we are so alike in some areas and "completely" different at the same time. Splitting the holidays seems to be a chore right now. He wants me to look at his family as my own, however we have only been dating for almost eleven months. He has a few siblings, one brother and two sisters. They are much older than him and his nieces and nephews are around his age. I feel I'm steering away from the point....
My point is, at this time, I want a family. I want it so bad, that I feel I'm willing to do anything to be a part of a "family". My father.... (and I use that word only because we share genetics and he did impregnate my mother)... is not around. He has been in and out of my life consistently. It has been a HUGE impact on my life concerning trust issues with men. So, of course that is also something I "want". I want and have wanted a normal relationship with my father.
Like I've said, around this time, most of us focus on what we want, and not what we have. I suppose I should talk about things I "have".
I have a boyfriend who loves me, who adores me (according to what he says). I have a mother who is there for me, even though I haven't been the most pleasant person to be around lately. I do have a car, and most don't. I do have a roof over my head and I do have people who care. It's really hard to focus on the positives when all you "feel" are negatives. I DO realize I am not in the worst situation I could be in. I realize that I am a fortunate person when it comes to having clothes, a home and transportation.
So with this said, I guess I'm thankful for the things I DO have. So happy Holidays!